Time to unload

Hello,


Time to talk about the events of the last three weeks. This time, I can say that so much has happened and I haven't always know what was going on, it has been impossible to blog until now.

Things started happening when I went to Hanoi one Tuesday to get my passport from the Chinese Embassy. I was unlucky and managed to cause myself a heatstroke the next day, running around Hanoi on the first warm days. Worst two and a half hour bus ride back to Hai Phong, busy holding my breath so I wouldn't present my breakfast for the whole bus. I made it home and spent the next two days in my cold, dark room shaking in fever.

As usual, it wasn't possible to for me stay in bed another day so off to work on Friday morning I went. I will not be describing how I was holding onto the teachers' table, trying to stay on my feet throughout the classes or how even the local teachers were looking at my struggles with empathy from the back of the class. I was literally shaking so much when I left, having not been able to keep any food down since the weekend, that I had to gather myself before I was able to drive.

This and a late payment of my salary, once again, led into some very rude and inappropriate messaged from my boss. As you may have read between the lines before, I have long struggled to enjoy my job and have not really been able to appreciate my experience in Vietnam. There are many underlying reasons for this that I will not analyse now. However, on Friday, feeling sick and tired both emotionally and physically, I had had enough. I felt trapped and just couldn't imagine myself going on any further down this path. I booked my tickets to Bangkok and called my mum. The following weekend was spent packing and organising things as well as in my friend's 30th birthday pool party.

I was lucky how things turned out; I got to see most of my friends before leaving, my friends from Thailand who I visited in Ho Chi Minh came to see me, and I had a chance to say goodbyes to the only class that was truly mine from the start of the year. I didn't want to abandon my position, nor had I long masterminded this escape. I feel sad that I couldn't finish what I started but I saw no other option. My farewells to my class were beautiful. The students were aware that the two following weeks would be cancelled so I didn't have to provide them with further information. We played some games, they won more than 2,5 kg of candy from me, we took some pictures and they sang songs for me. My favourite students came to hug me and talk to me. I could have never imagined that I could teach and form these kinds of relationships with my students, I adored teaching some of my classes and I learned a lot. Looking back at it even now, I am happy I did it.

I have no regrets.


Best wishes,


Mira